What are you looking for?

I started the day off with a first date, a breakfast date. A bold move for a new year. It’s comforting, as I get older, to embark on a date and call it that, to not act like we have something extremely casual with zero pressure, just two buddies meeting. So while it’s refreshing to jump right into the important stuff, I still stumble when asked “What are you looking for”?

My instinct, as always, is to answer with humor. To deflect. But what am I looking for? It’s certainly not what I was looking for ten years ago. Also, I’m not looking, at least not actively. I’m waiting for love to show up, announce itself, ready, easy (though it’s never easy). I told my companion that I’m looking for a man with whom I’m compatible. Compatible is one of those words that’s hard to define. I think of it as comfort. Comfort in someone’s presence. Feeling at ease, sharing a worldview. Not having to explain yourself, being able to just be. Now put that in a dating profile.

Were the gentleman from this morning’s coffee date and I compatible? Somewhat. It’s hard to say. Another date is in order. With him, and with others. And the beat goes on.